Last season The Hump dethroned the King. He was the most hated man in NBA. I’m not sure why though. Lebron James was an ass and screwed over the entire city of Cleveland. Where, Humpty Dumpty here was screwed over by an ass the size of Cleveland. In my expert opinion (yes, I’m an expert, I watch all the shows and read the magazines while I wait in line at the Supermarket), Kris did nothing wrong to Kim. She opened her shallow heart for all of us to see and then milked every minute of it to land a huge deal with E!. Too bad K-Hump didn’t get a spin off or a decent NBA contract…until today.
Kris finally got what he deserved. He landed a 2 year $24MM contract with the Brooklyn Nets, which, by the way is part-owned by his Ex-Wife’s Boyfriend’s BFF. Awkward… But this is a sports blog, so allow me to touch on a few things that I find shocking. Humphries has been treated like a D-League Power Forward for his entire career.
Hump was drafted by the Jazz in 2004. After two short seasons in Utah (’04 to ’06) he was traded to Toronto. Granted he didn’t do much for the Jazz, but from what I can remember, the Jazz weren’t doing much either. In Canada, Kris busted his ass every little chance he got to play and started showing off his boarding skills. Regardless of having career high games of 18 boards and proving to be a valuable Power Forward he was shipped to Dallas in 2009. After one short season in Dallas he was traded to then New Jersey Nets. So in 2011 around the time he started dating Kimmy he averaged a double double for the Nets. That means he was averaging double digit points and double digit rebounds. So how do they reward him? The hook him up with a one year $8MM contract 20 days after he filed for divorce. After that whirlwind sham of a wedding and being dragged through the Kardashian mud, he was able to average a double double in points and rebounds for a second season in a row!
Last season he averaged:
According to ESPN: “Only 5 players have averaged at least 10 points and 10 rebounds per game in each of the last 2 seasons: Kevin Love, Dwight Howard, Blake Griffin, Pau Gasol…and Kris Humphries.”
He kept his head up and did his job well. Even Lamar Odom, golden son-in-law, couldn’t play in Dallas. He’s in his head so bad that E! had to cancel their best spin-off, Klohe and Lamar. I tip my hat to, Kris, weathering that stuck up narcissistic storm would have broken most men.
It’s about damn time Brooklyn. You should have signed him sooner. You just watch, he’ll back up Gerald Wallace better than any monster contract you would have absorbed from Orlando. It’ll just be a little weird next season on Keeping Up with the Kardashians when Kim and Kanye double date with Jay-Z and Beyonce at a Knicks – Nets game.